Posts Tagged ‘Manic’

Just thinking…

Wednesday, December 14th, 2005

It is easier to try to be a decent person once you accept the fact and admit to yourself that you are a bad man. It allows you to answer a lot of difficult questions with honesty and without shame. It grants a peace, even though that peace is not always the what one might ideally consider as such.

You are who you were.
You are who you are.
You are who you will be.

There is little benefit in crying over spilled milk, beer, or blood.

Andy has a posse.

Tuesday, October 18th, 2005

Just so that you know, I am no longer completely isolated and lonely here in Texas.

andy has a posse.

i’s gots minions now. quillions o’ minons.
respek! booyashaka! word.

Giant Boy Attack!

Tuesday, March 22nd, 2005

Well, it isn’t officially completed, because I still need to bake/heat-set the paint onto the shirt, but since all of the paintwork is complete, here is the t-shirt that I have been working on over spring break: Rawr!

Wednesday, February 2nd, 2005

I need to learn how to just not care about everything so much. I don’t know why I let things like this bother me. I know what’s going on, I know that it is out of my control, and for that matter, I would’t have any right to conrol it even if I could, but I keep wanting for things to be different than they are. I like to think that I can change the world, that I can help people chenge themselves for the better. I need to just work on changing myself for the better, but it’s easier to see others’ mistakes than my own mistakes. I just can’t see myself objectively, no matter how hard I try. That is why I can give good advice but then not even be able to take my own advice. I can’t help myself, so I try to help others… but you can’t really help anyone who won’t help themselves. Sometimes life feels like a train screeching and sliding down the rails towards a collapsed bridge. Those of us in the front can see what’s coming, but none of us have any power to stop it. We are all fucking doomed.

Sunday, January 16th, 2005

ahahahahahahaha! i have done the most awesome/awful thing ever. i have created a PDF that will allow you to print onto 45 sheets of paper to create a pointilism-styled image of tubgirl as a approximate 6 ft x 5.5 ft poster.


Thursday, December 30th, 2004

I’ve never been much of one for making New Year’s resolutions for myself (except for the occasional “This year, I am not going to let the fact that people–in general, as a whole, as individuals, with a handful of exceptions–who deserve my loathing make my year suck quite as bad as last year”). I’ve always been more for gradual self-improvement whenever convenient, necessary, or otherwise attempt-able.

As part of this, I have recently been trying to accomplish a few personal changes:
(1) Allow/force self to be more extroverted/outgoing.
(2) Allow self to be more off-the-wall and uncensored in the making of levity and humor.
(3) Maintain (and increase if possible) personal levels of unrestrained honesty when dealing with others.
(4) Get back into shape, you lazy unhealthy fuck.

For the most part, I have been making strong advances toward these goals (with the exception of #4). I have noticed that by employing these strategies rather sporadically, I am beginning to think and behave in a manner that might be perceived as a bit schizophrenic. I began to devise new approaches to achieve my goals without regressing into a lovable creepy psychotic, but then I decided not to bother. My New Year’s resolution–primarily only regarded as such due to the timing–is to wallow in my own crazy. So if I have recently done or will soon do anything that pisses you off, blame it on the New Year.

Monday, November 29th, 2004

Do you ever play a song, and it affects you so much that you feel like you are about to convulse, have a seizure, have an aneurysm, have a cardiac arrest, vomit, and cry all at the same time? I have been having trouble sleeping (surprise surprise), so I decided to listen to some old songs that I have not listened to for awhile. One of them just so happens to be a song that makes me feel as though I am on the verge of doing each of the aforementioned things simultaneously. Even having only listened to the first few seconds was enough, and now my skin is tense and hurts, and I feel evenmore exhausted than before. Fuck.

Sunday, November 28th, 2004

I have been feeling a lot better this past month than I have in a long time. Things haven’t really been much better than usual, but my outlook has been improving and somewhat less pessimistic. Part of it is forcing myself to interact with others. Part of it is forcing myself to close certain chapters of my life and move on. Despite my better overall condition, I still have my moments of misery. Most evenings, unless I am out with friends, I find myself falling into despair and loneliness. I used to use art or writing to help distract (or at least, in some manner, relieve) me from these feelings. For awhile, I used to work on my car to do this as well. I have done all that is practical for my car, and so the only work that I do on it now is maintenance, which is still rewarding but not very effective at relieving my tension. This fall, I used my Halloween costume to accomplish this on a smaller scale. I have a few ideas for paintings to start on, but I keep putting them off for one reason or another. Very soon though, I hope tp have a new distraction with the 1958 Volvo. Assuming that I don’t go completely broke in the process, there are almost endless things to do which will let me forget my troubles and focus on something more meaningless.

“Operation: Go-For-Broke-For-Halloween” – Mission Accomplished

Monday, October 25th, 2004

Rather than do homework or laundry–both of which are very important to get done–I spent the day completeing my costume. Honestly, I am really pleased with how well it has turned out, and I am super-excited for this weekend. I rule. I rule. I rule. Word.

Bureaucracy, 999+ : Humanity, 1

Wednesday, October 20th, 2004

Most of you are probably unaware of my recent WVU crisis, but the matter has been resolved today.

After this semester, I would only need 4 credits to graduate: Advertising Campaigns, Communications Organizations/Institutions, English Literature, and Humanities.